Word up, Hot Mic / Lots of stuff you’re gonna like

Posted by Jeff on Sep 26th, 2024 in News | 0 comments

Busy month coming up. Busy in a good way, I hope.

First, this weekend, I’ll be exhibiting once again at Word on the Street, Toronto’s annual outdoor book fest.
And I’ll have an actual table this year! Yes, I won’t have to busk like last year. They actually found and processed my application this time. Huzzah.

Look for me in Section C, just south of St. Joseph Street.
I’ll be selling copies of my novel Hate Story (mostly paperback). If you already have it, why not buy another one as a gift?

Second: for four Tuesdays in October, you can catch me attempting performing stand-up comedy at Hot Mic, at Comedy Bar Danforth (the east location).
I’ll be joined by other recent grads of the Comedy Bar PRO stand-up class. Each feature lineup is followed by a “bucket” open mic. And on the 8th, I’ll even be hosting the open mic. Huzzah again.

Tickets and other info available via the links on the right sidebar.

If you want a sense of the type of shenanigans you’re in for when you catch me trying doing stand-up, here’s a video of my Advanced showcase performance back in July:

Eat lead, Einstein.

This morning I shot an elephant that was wearing my pajamas

Posted by Jeff on Sep 7th, 2024 in News | 0 comments

You might’ve heard (or maybe not, but who cares) that I got accepted into the Comedy Bar “PRO” stand-up class.
This means either that Comedy Bar believes in my stand-up potential more than I do, or that it’s really not that hard to get into the PRO class.

Anyway.
I’ve been doing this class since July, and now the final class showcase is happening in less than two weeks on the Comedy Bar mainstage.

I’ll be performing a set about the horrible, out-of-control toddler who lives in the apartment upstairs from me. There will be a couple of digs at the Ford brothers thrown in too. I wanted to throw in a cannibalism joke (the same one from my set in the Advanced showcase), but was advised against it this time.

Tickets available at the link on the right sidebar.

If you can’t make that night, but still want to watch me attempt stand-up, you can catch a sneak preview of the show this week at Hot Mic, in the basement theatre, Tuesday the 10th at 8:30 p.m.
This show includes a “bucket” open mic as well. I don’t recommend putting your name in early, because you’ll be on the bottom and they pick only twelve. Trust me. I learned this from hard experience.

(Both of these events are at Comedy Bar’s East location, 2800 Danforth Avenue, at Danforth and Dawes.)

And I expect I’ll be performing at (maybe even co-hosting) more Hot Mics in October, so keep an eye out.

Now. If you want to get in the mood with some real comedy, here’s a bit of classic Bill.

See you in the funny papers, Boo.

What’s the deal with Comedy Bar? I’ve heard of a crowbar, but this is ridiculous!

Posted by Jeff on Jul 6th, 2024 in News | 0 comments

My class showcase for my Advanced stand-up class at Comedy Bar is this Wednesday.

 

 

I’ll be doing a bit about how I still don’t know how to talk like grownups. There may or may not be a cannibalism joke in there. More likely may.

Tickets available via the link on the right sidebar.

Now. If you want to get in the mood with some real comedy, here’s a bit of Dylan.

 

 

Toodles, yo.

Saturday in the Salon / It isn’t yet the Fourth of July

Posted by Jeff on May 26th, 2024 in News | 0 comments

Another Zoom gig coming up at the end of this week: I’m kicking off June with a virtual reading at Saturday Literary Salon, hosted by Dane Ince.

I’ll be reading from my novel Hate Story, with a little bit extra, and there will be an open mic, so you can share your own work with an international audience.
The Zoom link will be available on this web page.

In other news, I’m currently continuing my stand-up classes at Comedy Bar Danforth, and there will be a couple of live class shows in July.
I’m still not one hundred percent sure that stand-up comedy is something I want to pursue seriously (or if it is, I probably should’ve done it twenty-five or thirty years ago), but I’m enjoying the classes and meeting a few interesting people. You can see me at the occasional local stand-up open mic, where I’m often the only performer whose material isn’t about sex or scatology. (And always the only one promoting a book.)

I’ll leave you with the most infamous Thomas the Tank Engine episode, for no particular reason. I think Henry deserved his punishment, don’t you?

Cheerio.

The Colour of Magic Theatre

Posted by Jeff on Apr 22nd, 2024 in News | 0 comments

Quick note to let you know (if anybody even reads my website) that I’m featuring once again at Magic Theatre Poetry Reading on Zoom, next Sunday at 9:30 a.m. EST.
The reason it starts so early is that the host (and the live version of the series) is based in Thailand. So the start time is also 2:30 p.m. in the U.K. There’s an open mic following my set, so feel free to share your own writing with the folks.

Facebook event page linked on the right sidebar, complete with Zoom link info.

In the meantime… I’ve been dabbling in stand-up comedy. For better or for worse.
I’ve completed the Second City stand-up classes and am soon going to start the Advanced class at Comedy Bar East. And I’ve appeared at a few open mics here and there. So far, it’s not going badly enough to quit.
Here’s a video of my Second City Stand-Up 2 class show on February 25. See if you can guess which part is a ripoff of one of my poems.

See ya. Don’t take any wooden igloos.

Every girl’s crazy ’bout a Sharp Dressed Words

Posted by Jeff on Feb 22nd, 2024 in News | 0 comments

I know this is short notice, but…

I’m going to be one of the vendors at the second annual Sharp Words book fair in Hamilton this Saturday.

I’ll be sharing the venue with many small and independent presses. If you’re in or near Steeltown on the weekend, drop by, say hi, maybe even buy a copy of Hate Story if you don’t have it yet.
More information at the link above and on the right sidebar.

Also… if you’ve been following my brave attempts at stand-up comedy since last summer:
I’ve been taking the second Second City stand-up class for the past several weeks, and my final class show is this Sunday. Tickets linked at the listing on the right sidebar. I don’t know if I’m supposed to be inviting folks publicly like this (it’s mainly intended for family and friends of the class members)… but screw it, you’re probably not even reading this anyway.

Now, here’s a cute young’un watching Psycho for the first time.

See you soon, crocodile.

He do the song about the sweet lovin woman. He do the song about the knife.

Posted by Jeff on Jan 11th, 2024 in News | 0 comments

Just a couple of quick things to start off the year.

One:
Remember when I said that I was going to be the guest in the January 2024 episode of the poetry podcast The Poetic Robin Hood?
Well, I did not lie. And you can listen in here.

Two:
It’s that time of year again… time for Damon Lum’s birthday, which means he’s hosting another Ad Lib’s Got Talent at the Arts and Letters Club. I’m in it again, along with the usual gang of comics and musicians and what have you. Info on the right sidebar.

If you’re not good, I may even decide to attempt stand-up comedy.

Now… here’s a thing. A thing for you.

Buy my book.

New Year, new podcast interview, no problem

Posted by Jeff on Dec 16th, 2023 in News | 0 comments

Well. What a year that was.

I did a book tour in Australia. I saw lots of crazy animals there, dipped my feet in the Indian Ocean for the first time, swam in the Pacific Ocean less than forty-eight hours later, and performed in a handful of well-paid poetry gigs. Failed to see a living quokka, though.
I also conducted my own little ragtag Canadian Book-Fair Mini-Tour (inspired partly out of petty anger at the way Toronto Word on the Street mismanaged my exhibitor application this year). This tour saw me attempting to promote my novel Hate Story in Ottawa (twice), Vancouver and Lethbridge, Alberta. I was also supposed to be at an event in Timmins, but the flight was delayed and eventually cancelled at the last minute (never, ever, ever booking with Porter again); I was also hoping to be in Montreal two weeks ago, but apparently that event was too cool to accept my application. Missed my chance to do a Hamilton fair because I didn’t even know of its existence until the last minute; maybe in 2024?

And I performed at the inaugural New Mexico Poetry Summit in Albuquerque. And I had a few other gigs here in Toronto, and a few on Zoom. And the Writers’ Union of Canada selected one of my short stories as a runner-up in a contest, finally and definitively proving York University wrong about my writing abilities. And I was showcased in the Toronto Guardian and appeared in at least one more podcast…
And I performed stand-up comedy in front of live audiences for the first time, and found I wasn’t entirely terrible at it. And I turned fifty, with shockingly little life accomplishment to show for it. Just think of what Orson Welles achieved before he was thirty. I’m a disgrace.

Who knows what’s in store for 2024? I have no idea; almost all of it is up in the air.
One thing I do know: the year will kick off with my appearance on The Poetic Robin Hood, a poetry podcast hosted by Christopher Moore. No, not the famous Christopher Moore – the Chicago-based poet.

The episode will be available on New Year’s Day, on Spotify and other online platforms.
Not sure what time it’s going live. I’ll be flying home from Saskatchewan that day (yes, more bloody flying), so I’ll catch it later.

Now, here’s Baby Meryl Streep silently showing her love for the Beatles.

See you next Tuesd—I mean, next year.

Where women glow and men plunder

Posted by Jeff on Oct 11th, 2023 in News | 0 comments

I made it. I made it to Oz.
The land of Jacko and Yahoo Serious and bigger knives than yours.

If you have friends on the east or west coasts, tell them to get themselves to one of my events with Paul R. Kohn:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Let’s hope I get to meet Skippy:

G’day luv.

Quoth the Artsy Raven: “Listen more.”

Posted by Jeff on Oct 7th, 2023 in News | 0 comments

September was a bonkers month, and October is already set to be bonkerser.
Albuquerque was fantastic, but Vancouver and Lethbridge… seemed like a much more fun idea back in May. I’m never zigzagging across the country like that again, over a couple of weekends, just to sell a handful of books. I’m not saying I regret it, but I’m never doing it again. (At least not on my own dime.) Way too stressful and expensive. If I’d had more vacation days available, I would’ve just stayed out west the whole time like a sensible person. But such was not to be, Cherie.

You may already know what’s coming next week, and I’ll post about that later.
In the meantime…

I’m featured in the latest episode of the podcast The Artsy Raven.

Watch JF Garrard’s interview with me here:

You can also listen to the episode on Spotify:

(Note: the interview was back in June or so. Since then, I have successfully joined Instagram and have also attempted stand-up comedy.)

Stay tuned. More to come.
In the meantime… if you thought you were hallucinating that The Great Space Coaster had actually once existed, here it is. (For those who’ve never heard of the show, it was sort of Sesame Street with laugh tracks.

Farewell for now.