What’s the story, Morning Glory? What’s the tale, Cardin… ale?

Hey bud. C’mere.

Wanna hear a story? Do ya?

Well, I’ve got a couple of beauties for ya. I can even show ya where to get more.

Because it’s almost March, and I’ve got a couple of storytelling gigs this month. Seems my spoken-word features aren’t exactly drawing the masses these days, so I’m settling for the glamorous, millionaire-making world of storytelling. Maybe I’ll get discovered by some legendary raconteur and thrust into the celebrity spotlight. Only to die two years later from a freak overdose, later to be discovered lying on the bathroom floor with a magic marker stuck in my left nostril. It happens only to the best.

Ga.

First up, I’m doing Storytelling at Caplansky’s yet again. Only this time, it’s a special Storytelling at Caplansky’s. It’s so special that you should be willing to miss the Academy Awards for it. It’s the third-anniversary show, with K. Trevor Wilson, Zebulon Pike and a few other folks. I’ll be regaling the audience with memories of a horrible landlord to whom I like to refer as Canadian Archie Bunker. Stories and smoked meat, punks.

Then, later on, I shall make my debut in the long-ish-running “Tales Of…” series. It’s a popular series that’s found a new home in a snazzy west-end venue with a comedy-club vibe (the brick wall at the back of the stage helps). This month’s edition is Tales of Revenge, and I’m going to tell how I got the bouncer from the old Joker nightclub fired. Don’t worry, the asshat deserved it.

If you’d rather watch the Oscars than go to Caplansky’s on Sunday, well… fine. Just fine, then. But at least promise me you’ll do it based on one of my suggestions – in my latest Toronto.com article, “Where to Watch the Oscars in Toronto”.

See? That way, I still have power over you.

I also reviewed Canadian Stage’s production of Nina Raine’s Tribes, for Digital Journal. It’s still running until this Sunday, so hurry up and read it here.

Happy March. Say hi to the lion.



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